Wait…isn’t that something off a gramophone?

Fear not, no granpappies here.

We know that you like wine, or you probably wouldn’t be here reading this. As you might expect, we do too. More than just your pause in a curvy world, wine is fabulous, brooding, complicated, enjoyable, technical, magnificent, secretive. It’s so many beautiful things and frankly we can never learn enough about this most magnificent of creatures.

In fact, whatever has happened today, you deserve a glass of wine right about now, because a day where you didn’t burn the house down is a good day.  So if you haven’t grabbed one yet, go ahead. I’ll wait.

Great, you’re back.

Yes, we get it. You’re curious to get inside wine……no, not like in those winemaking Instagram pics where ‘awkwardly hairy dude’ is naked except for his togs and gumboots, beard deep in an open-top fermentor, adding his own sweet terroir to an almost finished maceration….it’s much much more, and like us, you wish there was an instrument to help you get a little deeper inside the wine world’s DNA.

Well there is. Sort of. OK, it’s kind of bizarre, completely devoid of technology, possibly has some weird old lady’s earwax lodged in it, and I doubt you could find one today if you really tried. Yes, I’m talking about an eartrumpet.

Huh? Let me explain.

You see, we don’t just make (at least, what we think is) the most delicious, decadent, extraordinary wines this side of the Melbourne CBD; we also exist as advisors to quite a few wineries around our lovely planet, under the auspices of our alter ego, Eartrumpet Consulting. Silly name, serious science. Mostly viticulture, with a smattering of ecosystem design, technical winemaking and winery flow design sprinkled in, helping our associates realise their loftiest goals of making better wines from their vineyards. Along the way, oh, the stories we hear….

So, if you’re as fascinated as we are with the dark underbelly of the world of grapevines, you’ve come to right place. In under two minutes per episode, we are going to smack you about the gizzards with a selection of sordid tales, fascinating insights, raw confessions, some funnies, and a whole lot more, curated from the musings of ourselves. All in the name of science.

Categories : Ear Trumpet, linnaea

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